| Response |
| The abused may become dependant on the abuser and think they may not cope without them. |
| Because they are worried about the consequences if leaving their home and are fearful of their abusive partners |
| Because they are worried about the consequences if leaving their home and are fearful of their abusive partners |
| Because they are worried about the consequences if leaving their home and are fearful of their abusive partners |
| Because they are worried about the consequences if leaving their home and are fearful of their abusive partners |
| Well, I don't think its actually hard. But there are so many boundaries which they don't want to cross. As I said earlier usually women are in such cases and they chose to stay sometimes even if they are getting full support cos of the taboo its considered in our society. They are scared of the aftermath, the society won't accept them any longer and so on. So actually deep down inside they want to get out of such a situation at any cost but when the time comes to take the step they are scared and step back cos of some fears. And most of the times they can't really get out from it, they don't have the support be it financial or moral etc |
| they feel as though no one can stop what is happening to them. they feel homeless because of how weak they have become and how powerful the abuser seems. some mothers for example think that they should remain with their abusive husband because of their children, other mothers get pressure from their own maternal family members who themselves feel that they will be disgraced if the woman leaves her husband, because nobody else knows what happens in the home. this tends to happen in the southeast asian households i think. |
| Their partners make them believe they deserve it or shame |
| love, lack of confidence, maybe nowhere else to go |
| There may be children involved.
They may not want the stigma involved around a divorced person in an Asian community.
They may think divorce is wrong.
The abusing partner may threaten the victim. |
| For the sake of children. Pressure from in-laws. Threatening claims from their abusive spouse. What other members of the community may think/gossip about you. |
| because it is not easy to forget such unethical acts.. |
| They may love their partner
Be financially reliant on them
Have children with them
Fell it's not not socially, religiously or morally acceptable to leave their partner
Think its their fault
|
| Financial security. Plain and simple. Economic independence would allow women to escape these relationships easily, but for reasons of systemic sexism, many women do not have economic independence. |
| they have fear from their partner |
| They have not safe place to go to and society just offers gossip and stereotypes. |
| They are trapped in it like a cloud. Maybe they feel this is their life and it cannot change, particularly as they can only see it from their perspective. They may even justify it to themselves. They may be afraid of consequences. When in trouble it may be difficult to seek help, maybe they don't think they're worthy of help, or that anyone can help them. They probably feel highly embarassed and uncomfortable about it. |
| You cant leave your family. And if its the spouse who is doing this, than he has already first abused her mentally than attack her physically. So she already feels she is in need of him to survive. |
| Fear perhaps. "Love" maybe. |
| Insecurity, love for that person, lack of facilities and support, lack of information and directions to help and support that may be available to them, financial dificulties and many other reasons such as children or other memebrs of the family or they simply too scared. |
| Insecurity, love for that person, lack of facilities and support, lack of information and directions to help and support that may be available to them, financial dificulties and many other reasons such as children or other memebrs of the family or they simply too scared. |
| In fear of what others would say, or sometimes due to lack of a career or profession and lack of being able to support oneself, one would remain in the relationship for the financial support. |
| Yes. Because the abusive person is a bully and blackmails and threatens the victim in many ways. Not letting them out the house, or not letting them have any access to money or using the phone. Or threatening to hurt others whom the victim cares for. |
| I think, probably because, they are mentally affected by it. That is, they are too frightened to leave the relationship imagining something even worse if they did. In some cases, they would think, thats the only way to live and that if they left this relationship, they would not have any means of sustainance. |
| Difficult to get divorced are remarried, difficult if kids are involved. |
| because scared of being alone. scared of breaking up a family. scared of lack of support. scared of what ppl will say/think. |
| Dependence on partner or subjugation by partner. Battered woman's syndrome. |
| Very, become emotionally attatched and are worried about society and what others may think |
| it may be hard for some women to be able to feel independent enough to leave. abusive relationships may also involve to a certain degree some mental manipulation where the husband finds ways of degrading the woman. thus making her feel helpless and afraid to try to start a new life without him.
furthermore theres the issue of children if they have any, and how it will affect them. another problem is the shame related with divorce on a woman in our culture, and the fact that it is very hard to remarry once divorced. |
| because the worse known is better than the unusual new, meaning they find it hard to start something new, cos on the one hand they cant see themselves in a different life on the other hand they are scared of the one u suppresses them |
| THey're either scared to lose their kids or death, in denial of the severity of their situation, sympathetic to their abusers, and/or unaware that there is help. |
| yes, because they most likly love them and want them to change back to before their violence. Or they may be scared because they were threatend by the abuser or afraid they will loose their spouse of kids. |
| There are still lots of myths about domestic violence which society believes, such as that it doesn't happen very often and when it does its not serious so you should put up with it. Also that if it is happening the victim must have done something to deserve it. These myths are also believed by the victims so it is hard to go against what society is telling you your whole life. |
| They have feelings of low self esteem; financial dependency. |
| because abusive relationship has an abusive fear of an abusive end. |
| Firstly, they love their partner. They always try to see the best in people and they always have hope that things will improve.
Secondly, threats may not only be made on the victim but possibly on the kids.
Thirdly, financial dependence plays a huge role as well. Many of our Muslimahs do not have any marketable skills to be the breadwinner. |
| it is hard for them as their self worth and self confidence within them selves has been shattered by the abuser...they are fearful of jot being strong enough to leave the relationship because of the fear that has been drilled in to them...and also of the fear of bringing shame upon the family especially in a an asian family ...its basically a put up and shut up policy..the stigma and abuse of peoples taunts if they leave the relationship. |
| Because the abuser is bullies, controls, manipulates and belittles the victim |
| Usually if children are involved, then yes. |
| Because if there are small children, it is a dfficult one, women may not be able to support their family financially on ther own, maybe they hope that their partner will change and in doing so they are in that abusive relationship for much longer |
| Lack of resources |
| culture, fear from family, sense of hopelessness and helplessness, fear of not finding another to marry, financial worries. |
| It is hard, very hard, if they have children involved. They may also (women) find it hard to find employment due to lack of skills or any kind of working experience if they have been housewives most of their married life. It is also due to threats from the abuser if they are to speak up or try to reach out to someone. |
| There have got to be many reasons. I can only think of a few right now.
People tend to work within the system. Not many are revolutionaries. Only a few people are willing to bring about revolutions within their lives. A lot depends on a person's threshold... whether it is crossed or not. Some are more patient than others.
Social pressures. What are other people going to say? What am I going to say about myself if my relationship fails?
Financial pressures.
Fear of change.
Uncertainty surrounding the future vs. the certainty of the present. |
| yea, partly because they might have no where else to go |
| Because they are financially dependent, they are afraid of the cultural norms, family honor. Men are proud after they beat the wife and the victim is embarrassed to even mention it. They are afraid of the breakup and the repercussion they have to face. Men get away with their salaries and freedom, women are stuck with children, expenses and no money. |
| As above (section 13) |
| Because they usually stay for the children or they love the person too much. |
| Society might single them out! (they may be talked/ gossiped/ slandered about).
The person may feel lost without their partner - they may be wholly dependent on their partner.
The couple may have children, and therefore for teh sake of the children the person is staying in the relationship.
The victim thinks 'this is the last time, it will stop after this'
The reasons are endless... |
| They may be scared that the person may come after them/might be manipulated or blackmailed in some way |
| They find it hard to leave the reationship. This has nothing to do with abuse. With ot without they want to stay in it because of love and bonding. |
| The abusive relationship serves some purpose in the live of the abused |
| They become dependent on the abuser as a result of the mental abuse and feelings of inadequacy. |
| because they worry what the community/family will say about them |
| Love of the person when they are not being wronged...waiting for that "peacful" moment they they had or have time to time, not feeling they have the right, fear of the unknown,no where to go, Low self astem....tools, tools, tools |
| commitments, family expectations, no support from friens/family who want a simple life |
| You areblind to it all, you don't realise! Even though my arms and legs would be black and blue and sometimes he would suffocate me, he never did it out of anger, but as a joke. Even though I asked him to stop, his pride came first, so you feel, being the better person you'd almost sacrifice yourself for their enjoyment |
| Children, cultural views |
| Children. Social isolation. Cultural issues. Finances. Lack of education. Some women cannot speak English, and are not independent, though they live in Canada. |
| Fear of separation/loneliness/being frowned upon in society. |
| I think its fear. They are scared of what the partner might do. (that was my reason) |
| They may find it hard because they do not want to leave, and perhaps in many cases the harm of this is greater. Perhaps they find it hard to leave because they realize that the harm of leaving is greater, and do not leave until it no longer is. The reasons for this may be their children, or lack of a way to produce income, avoiding shaming their family, avoiding admitting that their family was correct in objecting to their spouse, that their abusive partner is otherwise good to them and their family, and there could be a lot of reasons.
I object to the notion that leaving is the best and immediate response. I think that this is a knee-jerk, supposedly empowering reaction, that appeases the ego and ethos of feminists, rather than always solving the problem. To qualify that statement, I am a sociologist with a Sociology degree from Columbia University, where, along with Barnard College, I studied feminism. |
| They may find it hard because they do not want to leave, and perhaps in many cases the harm of this is greater. Perhaps they find it hard to leave because they realize that the harm of leaving is greater, and do not leave until it no longer is. The reasons for this may be their children, or lack of a way to produce income, avoiding shaming their family, avoiding admitting that their family was correct in objecting to their spouse, that their abusive partner is otherwise good to them and their family, and there could be a lot of reasons.
I object to the notion that leaving is the best and immediate response. I think that this is a knee-jerk, supposedly empowering reaction, that appeases the ego and ethos of feminists, rather than always solving the problem. To qualify that statement, I am a sociologist with a Sociology degree from Columbia University, where, along with Barnard College, I studied feminism. |
| Because often the power of the perpertrator is such that the victim or 'survivor' has low self esteem low self worth. This is due to the perpertrator wearing them down. DV has no barriers at all. It crosses class, culture religion race |
| threats, guilt trips, etc. |
| Dependence, love, fear for retribution (towards them or other family members or friends), fear that God might condemn them (based on the nonsense that a divorce enfuriates God in any circumstance, or that women's gateway to heaven is through servitude towards their husbands,...), simply not knowing how to go about it, having no one that they can trust to help them,... |
| maybe good sex life!! maybe abuse came later on in the relationship where the couple have spent many memerable times together, and too late, they are deeply in love. other reasons children, maybe she feels the children need their father, or maybe security, money. most of the time it is because the woman is timid and lacks courage is easily influenced and intimitated and has an incredible fear for her life, if her partner is extremely violent she probably thinks there is no where for her to go and he will find her and kill her if she does leave. |
| They see no route out or are blinded by love and their responsibility to look after their children. |
| Because they have nowhere else to go. |
| Most victims have a family and leaving their children behind or perhaps even their partner is hard. Islam teaches us about Sabr and we seem to think that if not today, tomorrow will be a better day inshallah. There may be lots of bulliness going on around as well as threats. That's all I can think of. or perhaps nowhere to go to or don't know who to contact or what to do. or perhaps people are just scared to let an outsider know what's going on within their household, there's always the pride of the family and all. |
| YES! There is a lot at stake specially in a religious muslim family because generally they are husband and wife and the victim (survivor) is emotional and financially invested in the relationship. ` |
| Yes |
| Because there are a lack of resources and because of cultural and societal attitudes about marriage and family. |
| depends. world is not a place you find a real relationship everyday, family, religion and children play a role tool. |
| Emotional connections to the other person, feelings of guilt or other emotional conflicts; also, practical considerations such as how to support themselves, e.g. many Muslim women immigrants are less educated than male Muslim immigrants and so have limited employment opportunities |
| Cultural factors such as looking bad infront of other relatives.
If the couple has had kids, it is hard for them to just break away. some times they willjust stay for the kids. |
| Fear, finances, children, the community |
| They're scared of losing stability, respect, parental approval etc. etc. |
| The same reason that normal people find it hard to leave any relationship: familiarity, fear of the unknown, stigma, etc. |
| The heart is a tricky organ. It tends to love those that do not show much love back, hence certain people of a relationship can control it. |
| Threats.... broken promises to not repeat it, lies.... A lot of intimidation, blackmail, the abuser threatening to kill himself, or harm you or the children if you left you know. |
| In some cultures breaking up of relationship is hard to sustain and becomes the cause of humiliation not only to the couple but to the families on both sides. It is more hard when children are involved and because of children's attachment with both parents it is hard to leave the abusive relationship. In some cases both partners are afraid of their future and men are more likely to get killed by their in-laws when they travel back home. |
| When children are involved, many women think it's better to keep the marriage intact for the sake of their children. |
| They feel they can't change the situation and feel stuck because of family obligations and also more importantly they're embarrassed and ashamed for others to find out about them in that kind of situation. |
| Cultural pressure, fear, fear of being ostricized by others in their cultural community, threats, family pressures, financial pressures, not wanting to disrupt kids school year, not knowing that they have options, language barriers, |
| The unrecogniton of abuse,the fear of loneliness or the effect it cna have on the developemnt of their children. |
| They may feel a level of responsibility for the abuse that they suffer, may not be able to leave for financial reasons, may not have community/family suppoet - there are many reasons why one may choose not to leave. |
| fear |
| low self esteem
no financial help
worry about what the kids will think of her
gave up the hope of having a better life outside current marriage
being disowned from family
lack of social support
fear of everything
fear of not surviving |
| Scared to lose custody of children. No income (fear of poverty) and fear of isolation from an ethnic community or family. |
| money, family, support, place to stay, safety |
| It depends on the victims financial stability and family and friends. |
| Often, they claim that they love the person, there are kids involved, making it all difficult from them to leave. They have to realise though, love and abuse don't go together, and neither can you benefit kids if you die, which sadly does happen in domestic violence relationship. |
| Emotional attachment, fear of the unknown, afraid of further and harsher abuse after to them or their family |
| Emotional dependency may be a factor. Relationships dont often start out violently- domestic abuse is something that happens down the line. As a result, the victim may feel that they cannot leave because they are still in love with the abuser. The abuser can also start to erode the victim's self-confidence and self-esteem through psychological/emotional abuse, which could increase the victim's vulnerability and their inability to leave due to insecurity. |
| Confidence and finances. |
| Fear of the unknown. Shame and feeling of failure, Lack of emotional support within the Islamic community, economic issues, the fact that some women feel that they have no choice but to accept their lot in life. |
| low self esteem they think they cannot do any better, family pressures, no income, have nowhere to go.they may end up beleiving what the spouse is saying |
| Many social/Cultural factors and stresses |
| Fear, Obligation/Duty, Dependancy |
| Depends on their personal circumstances. If they have children, they may feel like they have failed or they may feel situation would get worse if they attempted to leave the relationship. |
| They find it hard because their is so much at stake. First as they have commited to the relationship they feel its hard to get out of and leave. There are the families to think about. Who believe that aint a good enough reason for you to leave your husband over, as it is shameful to be divorced. |
| Because they love the person, and they have accepted them the way they are i guess. Might be scared. Maybe better to stay in the relationship for kids, home, financial support, alot of reasons, which she might not be able to handle if she was to do it all on her own. & cope with the pain as well as all the thoughts from the community. |
| children, shame of disgrace, fear of retaliation |
| They are dependant on the partner emotionally |
| They often think it is part of matrimonial ties.
They may have lack of self-confidence and do not think they can cope on their own.
They may have children and stay together for the sake of the children. |
| beacause they love the person so much that they can forgive and forget till things reoccur, or are afraid to leave because they have kids to provide for, or want the company, its really an emotional and physical attachment most of the time i believe. |
| Stereotypes. What people would think. No visible solution |
| denial, fear, felling unable to cope, dependance, isolation, a need to stay in a marriage at all costs I could go on |
| fear of emotional aloneness, underlying love, fear of financial instability, and external family etc. |
| Their personality is not well built. |
| Feel Trapped and pressure form families/cultire |
| family commitments ie children. also loyalty and reputation |
| sometimes it could be a mental attachement rather than love. victims have become attached and therefore find it hard to leave.
sometimes there are other issues involved to which why they cannot leave e.g victims new to this country are unaware of their rights and do not know of they help they are entitled to. maybe are unskilled and cant speak english therefore cannot work to live by themselves.
victims who are not yet citizens of this country have limited support with regards to benefits. and may not be able to support themselves.
by leaving it brings shame on the family, and could lead to being outcaste from the family or in some cases lead to honour related crimes.
sometimes they just have nowhere else to go and feel trapped.
however this is just a tip of the iceberg...there are many other reasons. |
| No support, and they are so used to being abused that they dont see it as abnormal. Most importantly is fear of what will happen to them from the abusive person and what the community might think. |
| Social expections, isolation, fear of being on their own after being with the abuser for a long time. fear of not being loved again, for sake of children. Total break down of individuality, no confidence in people or services or a future and constantly being worried the abuser will come back. |
| They falsely believe that the person loves them. They think that no one else will care for them. Abusers psychologically manipulate the abused to believe it is there fault. |
| fear of being independant, fear of no support or more importantly fear of rejection within the family/community....you end up feeling like a lepar as a divorcee |
| Bad mouth and they go exteme to say bad about their ancestors and family. |
| the reasons i think are a combination of complex emotions and motivations- some are psychologically dependent in that they cannot imagine another person who will love them, some are financially reliant on the abuser, some fear that the abuser will pursue until death, some fear ostracism from their communities, some deny the reality of the harmfulness of their relationships, some point to other characteristics of the abuser as being more beneficial. |
| becouse thir scared |
| scared of what the abuser might do.
scared of whaty people would say.
if they have children, may be scared to loose them |
| Becuase they are made to believe that they are less intelligent than them and would not be able to survivie without them. Also, they might be worried of the affect separation of parents may lead on a child. |
| Because they often still love the abuser. They don't have realistic options of where they could go or what they could do if they did leave. |
| fear, traditions, customs, cultural issues. |
| they are scared, |
| Maybe they think its normal, too scared. |
| complexity of relationships, social status, children, finances... |
| Fear. Once fear is instilled in a relationship where one person is being abused and afraid of the other person, leaving becomes the most freightening possibility. When someone is afraid to speak, eat and overtime beleives the abuser that they are worthless, leaving doesn't even seem like an option. THe victim thinks leaving would hurt him/her rather than help. It's unfortunate, but i think fear keeps people from leaving abusive relationships. |
| Social conditioning to keep it hidden |
| they think they can fix the damaged and they stay cause they think it will change one day |
| Relationships are more appealing than being lonely. It's a way of thinking as well, often victims feel that they deserve the abuse that they get and don't see it as abuse. |
| because they feel that they cant leave, feeling a faliure, scared of not coping, no where to go, |
| Lack of support network, unwillingness to leave everything behind and start from scratch. |
| Guilt, fear. |
| no options- no child care so mothers can work. |
| Yes they do. There is fear that if they leave what will happen to those left behind. There is fear of retaliation because often times they are threatened with death or severe beatings if they leave. They will have nothing without the abuser's support. There is also the destruction of the victim's self esteme and feelings of stupidity and no worth that keep a victim imprisoned with invisible chains so do net feel they can leave that they probably deserve the life that they have. |
| lack of finanical emotional codependence |
| Threats they receive from the abuser toward themselves or their shared children. The abuse is demoralizing and makes them feel they deserve it or couldn't find better. |
| Cultural pressure, beliefs that tell you divorce is wrong, society where women are often blamed and seen negatively for divorce |
| Well the men who abuse women might do so because their stressed. Women can easily forgive men. |
| They are financially dependant. Then, they are emotionally dependant. They think this is normal, that they deserve it. It is scary to make a big change in their life. The known evil is more comfortable than the unknown. |
| Feelings of guilt and responsibility and shame and helplessness, and perhaps financial dependence, and loyalty to abuser due to their relationship. |
| The cycle of violence has existed for thousands of years. Most of the women I have talked to don't leave these relationships because their husbands/partners have convinced them (the women) that they cannot make it on their own. Many women also stay in abusive relationships because they want their children to be taken care of, not realizing that these children as witnesses of abuse are being abused. |
| The abuser manipulates these women and lower their self-esteem and confidance..hence these women (victims) feel they cannot leave as without their partner they cannot survive. Also asian society provides no support whatsoever to these women/victims..they believe the man/husband is always right and that a women should stick by him no matter what. Society always take the husbands side, even if the most extreme forms of violence is being carried out against the victim. Hence because of this lack of suppport from society and her own family a woman feels she cannot leave the relationship. |
| stigma, lack of education, cycle of violence impacting their psyche, belief it was their fault, no other options for living, endurance for children's sake - many many reasons. |
| they're in love with their partner
They have children who need both parents
His/Her partner won't allow him/her to leave |
| culture, relgion,lack of confidence, lack of knowledege of the law and religion |
| complex psychological breakdown. The phenomenon of Stockholm syndrome. |
| Children's sake. No intention of divorce when deciding to marry.
No woman wants to leave her nest. |
| maybe they grew up being abused and are stuck in that cycle. i think there is a major mental aspect to abuse that plays a huge part of how long someone will put up with it |
| to afraid.no where safe to go.no money.no home to bring her children. |
| emotional & financial attached to the agressor. N some may no have anywhere to turn to for help. |
| 1) Hope that things will get better
2) No other place/person to go to
3) No monetary access
4) Dependent on spouse for visa (especially if in a foreign country)
5) Have kids and don't want to uproot them
6) Societal shame
7) Parental pressure to just hang in there |
| there is no community support, they feel responsible for the violence, economic dependency, feel of community isolation, fear of losing children, lack of affordable housing, etc |
| THey think that it will hapen again or they are scared they person will go after them. |
| some do |
| In long term relationships it's really hard to leave the relationship because they have been together for a very long time and they love each other. Or if they are Asian I mean as Bengali, Indian or Pakistani it's a tradition if they leave there partners people will talk and so on. |
| In long term relationships it's really hard to leave the relationship because they have been together for a very long time and they love each other. Or if they are Asian I mean as Bengali, Indian or Pakistani it's a tradition if they leave there partners people will talk and so on. |
| Many victims are made to feel depended on their abuser thus feel they are unable to depend on themselves. |
| - they love the person who is abusing them, and see what a nice person they are the rest of the time - some cultures there's a huge stigma of divorce particularly on women, so if they leave they fear gossip and being unable to marry again - there is also the question of who will support them, if they are stay at home mums and the husband is the sole provider for them and the kids. Plus the abuse itself often leaves the person feeling weak, powerless and unable to help themselves, so that just makes them more afraid to leave. Also, women whose fathers abused them or their mothers when they were children find it harder to leave because they spent so long as a child unable to leave, they feel nothing has changed, also they may feel like all men are like that. |
| because they love their partners, they feel that it is better for the kids to live in a nuclear family unit. it is very difficult, especially in some communities because of the stigma attached to women that seek divorce or leave their abusive partners. |
| Lack of financial independance, family disapproval, low confidence and feeling too dependant on the abuser. |
| Yes. |
| depends on the situation, if the couple have children then they sually put their children before them. also cultural baggage explains alot |
| They feel guilty, fink its der fault. |
| They feel they are to blame in some way |
| Because they beleieve they love them.
because of children
because of embarrassment
because of family pressure |
| no confidence or courage because of the mental/physical torture thats they've been through |
| for fear of the safety of themselves or their kids if they were to leave, no financial stabilty, fear rejection from the community and because of emotional guilt. |
| yes, definitely, out of fear they stay and tell no one. |
| i dont know |
| Because, sometimes they are trapped, physically, they cannot escapse. And for some, they are trapped emotionally, they still love that person enough they do not want to leave them despite being beaten up. |
| Because they are in love, or have children with them. |
| Because they are in love, or have children with them. |
| They're conditioned by the abuser and family to think this is what they deserve or how life is. Abuse is not just physical as you know. |
| Many reasons; financial security, shame, feeling they deserve it... |
| i think it is hard to leave any sort of relationship, bonds are not easily formed, love is irrational and complex and a feeling of responsibility is usually a major factor |
| Fear/Perception that 'it will stop'/Relationship built on other foundations other than violence? |
| Attachment, Insecurity, Children |
| emotional attachment, financial dependancy, community pressure, |
| families
comfort |
| Love, children. |
| low selfestem, scared that if they leave their partner ppl gonna look down on them mostly family, children and finacial situation. |
| for the reasons stated above. cultural practises first and foremost make it very difficult for people to even discuss abuse in a relationship. some communities deem it normal. most often victims are encouraged to stay in the relationship by their own families. this makes the victim feel powerless and isolated. divorce is viewed negatively in many communities, and the chances of this person getting married again are slim.
many times victims are told to stay in the abusive relationship to protect the family, or for the sake of children.
also, the victim may be heavily dependent on their spouse, so they feel if they leave the relationship, they will be destitute and will not be able to cope without them.
many times, the victim may also be brainwashed into thinking that this is normal, or their fate, or just how some marriages are. |
| Because they can be too weak and unable to do so. Or just too confused. |
| they too scared or are unaware of the options out there or sometimes they feel the outer world would be much harder on them than their abuser however most of the time is denial that their partner or whoever is actually an abuser!!!!!!!!!! |
| 1. family ties, childern
2. nowere to go |
| scared of something worse happening |
| love, confusion, low self-esteem and fear of being alone. |
| because they love the person who does it to them and they can't always see how they can get out |
| There are a number of reasons for this. Such as having dependant children who need the financial support of the abuser. Being scared of being made an outcast by the family. Financial dependance. Fear of further violence. Not knowing what help is available. |
| Sometimes in denial themselves, despair-which can make them leave or stay- for example if the violence wasn't always there... The victim still wants to help. Children involved, attached emotionally, cannot see beyond their situation and any positives coming out of them leaving, a lack of support also. |
| the victim may be dependent or the relationship has been long-term its hard to see life without that person. |
| reputation, family pressure, scared of the abuser. |
| Children are the main reason. Our culture and elders dont make things easy. its not easy telling people what actually happens behind closed doors either. |
| physiologically unstable, lack of economic support and also lack of independence to stand on their own two feet, lack of extended kin, culture, taboo. |
| opinions of others, children, family, financail security and lonliness |
| There many reasons why people don't leave,eg: Confidentiality, Language Barriers, Money, family honor,children,what service are out there and the most important is the right support. |
| yes |
| Because they are attached to that person who also has a big hold over them. |
| yes bcz der scared der made to feel der got no1 n no1 will belive o help dm |
| because they usually beleive it is their fault |
| dunp |
| they blame themselves. they believ they are the casue of the abuse |
| Because after the violence has occurred, the person seems to reassure their partner that it would not happen again, and make promises etc. |
| I would say its because the victim is emotionally attached to the abuser and thus keeps hoping they will change and so finds it hard to give up on the person. |
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I would say its because the victim is emotionally attached to the abuser and thus keeps hoping they will change and so finds it hard to give up on the person.
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| because the other person is normally very intimidating and theres always seems to be like alot of mind game going on in those relationship. |
| Victims dont want to be alone, dont want to leave their loved ones, honour, dont want to attract attention to themselves from outsiders. |
| Victims dont want to be alone, dont want to leave their loved ones, honour, dont want to attract attention to themselves from outsiders. |
| They remember the good times, they love the person their with and believe the person loves them back, trying to keep the family together, scared of reprisals, feeling like a failure, |
| Love, fear of being single, fear of society's pressure to be married perfectly. |
| I guess it is down to "What will the neighbours say?", basically the community you belong to and "saving face". |
| They don't know where to go to and whether their aggressor will come after them. |
| being in an abusive relationship myself, the reason why i couldn't leave was because i was scared of what the rest of society would think if i did leave. but that was the last of my worries. the reason i didn't leave because i continued to think he would change. i was very much in love with him, and the abusiveness wasnt apparent until i was head over heels in love. even though there were the moments of abuse, he would be very apologetic and then would be extremely loving, which of course, doesnt last for long. one needs to be out of the relationship to reflect on this, which is difficult if you are with the person all the time. after a while, it feels like the norm and your self-confidence is at such a low that you could not even think about leaving the relationship as you are led to believe that you are good for nothing and no-one else will accept you as you are apart from the person you are with. |
| because they are in the relationship, you can't break it. there must be other ways such as educating them to live peacefully in the relationship. |
| they are powerless and it is reinforced onto them by their partners |
| I have no idea |
| Because of false hope and the shame of a failed marriage or letting people know that you were a victim of abuse. |
| In most cases I would say yes. Love is a very powerful thing and can be abused as well as enjoyed. |
| main reason being social pressures |
| They're broken down and feel insecure, so they can't face the world. Constant pressure from the abuser makes them feel belittled about themselves. Pressure that the abuser might chase after them once they leave. |
| Because the violence is often the end of a large amount of emotional abuse which runs down self esteme and transfer blame in the mind of the victim onto his or herself. |
| Because of children often, or because they do not know how to survive/live alone if they are isolated |
| feelings of shame, self esteem issues, not wanting to be alone |
| They are way too scared and if i may add this in our culture and i think i can say this for Bangladeshi and Indian cultures too that their is a HUGE STIGMATIZATION that is associated with such kind of act. A woman is ALWAYS looked upon badly when she takes a divorce people think low of her, this is changing but it still exists. Other reasons might be that they will be left alone without a companion as no one would marry a divorcee or the person may have kids and some people suffer because their child would need the other parent or family. |
| Yes. |
| if they have kids and they are financially dependent on their suppose and if they dont have any family support around them. Also the stigma associated with leaving a relationship. |
| no effective support mechinisms in place,fear of reprisal attacks,rejection of family etc. |